Control

We all crave control.  Control what we eat, what we purchase, what we do for work, and so on.  What happens when we lose control?  Fear.  Anxiety.  Stress.

This coronavirus and subsequent economic crash combined are testing every bit of control we ever thought we had.  But is it really that different from pre-crisis time?

Every day, we live our lives like it’s our last day on earth, right?  No, not really.  Some of us do, but most of us try really hard.  We take things and people for granted.  It’s natural.  Until that thing or person is suddenly gone.  Today, a lot of that control is indeed gone or severely limited.

But here’s another way to think about it:  living through coronavirus and economic crash is still living each day as if it could be our last.  It may require even more effort, but this hasn’t changed.

If I head to the food store pre-crisis, I expect to buy all the food and product I desire.  If I see a product out of stock, I’m surprised, but I move on and either find a replacement or do without for that day/week.  If I head to the food store now, I don’t know what I will encounter.  The store could have empty shelves or people fighting over toilet paper.  So, the control is severely challenged right down to the most granular level.

But there are things we can still control –

• We can control our thoughts.
• We can control our words.
• We can control our behaviors.
• We can control how we treat ourselves and others.
• We can control being creative with what we do have.
• We can control what we do while contributing to social distancing.
• We can control the amount of news we watch.
• We can control our expectations.

Whenever my last day is on this Earth, I don’t want to be stressed or rude or angry.  I don’t want to waste the time or energy upset of what’s happening around me or to me.  I want to listen to good music.  I want to enjoy a glass of wine (and if I run out and can’t get any when I want to, a glass of Gatorade – in a wine glass).  I want to enjoy writing in my blog. I want to celebrate friends’ birthdays – even if over Facebook.  I want to FaceTime with friends and family. I want to look forward to our nephew’s wedding. I want to look forward to times with the new-ish babies in our family.  I want to enjoy walks with Bella.  I want to enjoy another Oklahoma sunset while I live here.  I want to be silly.  I want to laugh. 

This does not discount or minimize the harsh realities people are facing, but realizing I have control of some things is good enough for me.

Bonita Springs, FL

Some Positives from Social Distancing

The world is scary right now.  People are sick, dying, isolated, afraid.  So many are losing their jobs, so add ‘desperate’ to that list.  This is serious.  COVID-19 is a beast that is changing the way we live, work, and socialize. 

Social distancing is likely to become the phrase of the year – maybe even the decade.  I personally don’t mind it too much; my job can easily be done at home and I always have a puzzle going.  #homebody.  This social distancing isn’t so easy for many of you with children or with jobs that can’t be done from home.  And for most, it’s only been a week or so.  It will get old.

I expect that most of us will get annoyed eventually, argue with our spouses, yell at our kids or dogs, BUT for now, here’s what I’ve been seeing either in my own neighborhood or via Facebook/Insta posts –

• More people are out walking or playing with their kids in their driveways or yards
• Couples dancing in their kitchens
• Families out walking in the woods
• Runners out running – solo or in groups, notably distant from one another
• Family members continuing to “visit” their elders in nursing homes through the window
• Friends checking in on one another
• Friends posting cute/funny/light posts (we all need distraction!)
• Friends spring cleaning, getting organized, etc.
• Everyone’s rediscovering games, puzzles, and just going outdoors

I hope people continue to #stayTFhome so we can flatten the curve and start the healing.  Until then, I hope this “old fashioned” way of life continues for a little while.  I hate the reason for it, but it’s a good look for us all.