Emotional

Like many I’m sure, I’m feeling emotional as the one anniversary of the Boston Marathon bombing approaches.  I was nowhere near the danger and, gratefully welcomed Scott home after his completion of last year's race.  I can’t even imagine if I had been at the finish line of the 2013 Boston Marathon.  I also can’t imagine if Scott had been injured or worse.  But even though I wasn’t directly impacted, I feel so very much affected.

I’ve been hypnotized by the news recently and some well-done specials that portrayed a number of bombing victims’ experiences over the past year.  I’ve read articles and have been brought to tears by all that they have lost and all that they are fighting to get back.  And then I remember that we’ve all lost something.  Security.  Safety.  An expectation that supporting runners at a race will not leave you struggling to survive or mourning a loved one’s tragic and senseless passing. 

I’ve had moments where I can’t help but visualize what that feeling was like that day.  At 2:48 pm, all was right in the world and runners from all walks of life were meeting their goal of running Boston.  And then at 2:49 pm, lives, limbs, and innocence were lost.  This was in our backyard; our race; our tradition.  Just like that, it was all changed.

Although I did qualify for Boston this year and was proud of that feat, I didn’t make the final “cut” (that crazy 18 seconds).  Of course I felt the initial disappointment.  But as the year has unfolded and has lead up to this anniversary and the first running of the marathon since the bombing, I’m actually really OK with not running and frankly, with not being there.  Not this year anyway.  I will take the day off and spend it with Scott.  We’ll probably grab a run together, watch the race from home, and I know I will hold him tighter, thankful again that he escaped physically unscathed.

I’m so impressed with the resilience of the bombing victims and their families and for all those returning this year.  I don’t think I’m afraid per se, but it just doesn’t feel like a place I want to be just yet.  Like everyone, I want to see the 2014 Boston Marathon go off without a hitch and I want to see 2013’s bombing coverage replaced with 2014’s coverage filled with running, endurance, cheering, strength, and life.  

Those lost and injured will never be forgotten, but the human race will continue to move forward and take the memories of this tragedy and introduce memories of life, promise, and peace in its place.  I wish that for us all – and for our race called Boston Marathon.