Hopeful

After a long, meandering walk with Bella this morning, I headed back out to run.  I had a short, very easy run planned because my shin has been a little grouchy lately.  I left my watch at home and grabbed my usual gear:  hat, mittens, and…..pepper spray.

Today was also the Virtual Run for Sherry Arnold.  I’ve never participated in a virtual run of any sorts.  I’ve read about plenty of virtual runs or races, but this was one I needed to be a part of.  As I’ve written about previously, the tragedy of what happened to Sherry Arnold has weighed heavily on me (and so many others) ever since I first heard.  As a woman, a runner, and just a plain human being, I’ve been angry, sad, fearful, and now, hopeful.  I’m hopeful because a) it’s a much more productive emotion, and b) there are too many good people who outweigh the evil.

With that said, I found it difficult to run this morning.  The weight of mentally rehashing the events as I know them felt crushing.  I began imagining what might have happened and, without actual facts to go by, we know the mind fills in the blanks (right or wrong).  So, I had to push those terrible thoughts out of my head and focus on how happy I am that I’m able to run, that even though my shins are a little grouchy, I’m still physically able to get out and sweat.  I’m overwhelmed at the positive energy from so many people all over the world – all dedicated to running/walking/moving in memory of someone many of us never knew.

How can I stay in the “angry” space when “hope” is winning?  Sadly, Sherry’s family will never be the same, but I’m hopeful that they feel the camaraderie and the positive energy that has risen from the ashes of this tragedy.  As someone who didn’t know Sherry, I have gained something from this experience;  I have gained hope and a greater respect for the human race.

Go Us!